Breakfast, subway, National Art, snack, Capitol, Supreme Court, ice cream, subway, dinner. BRMC tonight at the 9:30 Club, and there's no way I am going to make the door open time of 7PM or write a proper blog, so alls you gets is some pix.

Something you should know about being down by the National Mall is that if you are hungry and don't want to eat in a museum cafeteria, you pretty much can only buy terrible, terrible truck ice cream like Bomb Pops and the Sponge Bob one that stains your face yellow and red for life.

Guess which 2 out of the 3 American citizens pictured here at the Capitol do not particularly enjoy walking around for miles in the heat! Go ahead, guess!

A nice view of the Washington Phallus.

"Mom, can I take a picture of the tree, Mom, can I take a picture of the tree, Mom can I take a picture of the tree, Mom..." "ALRIGHT!!!"

This is the statue that's on top of the Capitol building. Her name is Lady Capitialista, and she was a gift from the nation of Bolivia in 1859 and was hand-delivered by 100 children riding on zebra-painted mules to President Submarine S. Jackson III. I think that's what the uniformed guide was saying as I eavesdropped on a tour group.

I'm sittin' on the steps of the Court
Watching the legal tide turn away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the steps of the Court
Wastin' tiii-iiii-ime...

YAY! I JUST WON MY FIRST SUPREME COURT CASE! I did it by saying, "Because I SAID SO," in a really super-commanding tone with the Evil Eye trained RIGHT ON Scalia. Really. This happened. Google it, bro.

This is Granny from the back of the Beverly Hillbillies truck. I overheard that, too.

Did you know there was a SCOTUS Barbie? She gives tours.

OMG, JUSTICE HOT SEATS!!! I wonder if any of the chairs have built-in massage rollers like at the nail salon. Maybe they are ejector seats. I couldn't get close enough to see, so let's just say yes to both ideas.

This is what justice looks like on the way to the Supreme Court Gift Shop. I bet you didn't even KNOW there was a gift shop in the highest court of the land. This seems incredibly American.

I got a Supreme Court pen that has a tipping scales of justice when you move the pen back and forth. I am not at all kidding. I also got a big-ass Supreme Court mug for when I am drinking coffee at home and making snarky SCOTUS photoshops.

Finally, Internet Justice for Miss TOO MUCH INFORMATION PANTS.

Justice John Marshall just said, "NIIIIIIIIIICE." I swear, I heard him.