In these tough economic times, we all have to tighten our belts a bit. It may be that this year you might be foregoing your usual expensive blowout vacation and instead will be enjoying a "staycation" at home or at the Route 83 Motel with a flashlight that you can also use as a blunt instrument, with a guy you met at a Stuckey's called "Smokes." In that case, I have carefully prepared a few vacation postcards that you can print on card stock and send to all your friends and relatives to make it seem like you are having the time of your life anywhere else but your Diet-Pepsi-stained couch. They will be so shocked to get actual mail from you that they won't even look at the postmark, I promise.