STUPID EXTORTIONIST TRICKS

Wave bye-bye to convicted extortionist Robert "Joe" Halderman. Go ahead, wave!



Bobby Joe is headed off to prison for a few months, having come to the decision that not lying even more about trying to strong-arm $2,000,000 out of talk-show host and ladies' man David Letterman was the better decision. Halderman, who hopefully will meet some burly pissed-off Letterman fans in the joint, will also have to check in with a probation officer for five years to make sure he stops trying to be a complete weasel for profit. His 1000 hours of required community service should be cleaning the toilets of poor elderly folks with intractable diarrhea. With a toothbrush. No...with a Q-Tip.

Of course, Letterman's penance will last the rest of his days. There probably won't be a time he looks at his wife without thinking about how he hurt her, and how cowardice in a character can take even the greatest accomplishments down to the ground. He's got a lot to think about, and a lot to figure out about himself. But that will be done privately.

To try to get rich quick off of someone else's personal failures isn't exactly uncommon, but in this case it was criminal. Have fun, Bobby Joe...don't drop the soap!