Doctor: (knocking on office exam room door, entering room) Oh, hi (glances at my medical chart in hands)...Marianne! Good to see you again!

Me:(indecipherable reciprocal greeting that sounds like "Hayp")

Doctor: How have you been?

Me: Well, I...

Doctor: Great! (looks at her laptop with my information) Oohh...some of these numbers are a little high. I'm going to give you some pills, k?

Me: Um...what? I don't like taking medications. What is this for, what are the side effects? Is there any kind of alternative? What exactly are you giving me?

Doctor: (Staring at smartphone) What's the name of your pharmacy? I'll text the scrip over right now.

Me: I don't really want...

Doctor: (smiles triumphantly) There! It was in my database all along! All done! Jackie will be in to draw some blood and give you a flu shot. Good to see you! Make an appointment to come in so we can recheck you in three weeks! (leaves room briskly)

Me: I...oh. Shit.