Do you remember when 16 Magazine, the long-running (1957-2001) teen fan mag, used to run the "5 Errors Contest" in each issue? I bet you don't, because I bet you aren't as old as ME. Anyway, it was a simple premise: find the five errors in a simple line drawing of  some heartthrob, like Elvis or the Beatles or Sajid Khan...or even Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention! I was compelled to do the 5 Errors Contest in all my copies so I could once again prove how brilliant I was to myself. I would send in the "WRONG" drawing with the errors circled as instructed, as did THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS OF OTHER BRILLIANT GIRLS, and waited patiently for Georgia Winters to pick my entry and give me TEN BUCKS!

Well, that snooty Ms. Winters never did chuck me over a lousy sawbuck, which caused me to become disillusioned with achievement and start life anew in Davie, Florida as a rodeo clown. Only part of that last sentence is true. Anyway, today I made you what might be the shoddiest Photoshop rendering of a 5 Errors Contest ever, starring my dear band pals, wimps! Study the two drawings carefully, and then circle the errors on your computer, smartphone, or tablet screen with a crayon. Then scroll down and check to see if you were correct! NO CHEATING!!! Honestly, if you have to cheat to see these, make an appointment with an eye care professional immediately. You can click on the drawings to enlarge, Blindy McSeeberg.

Ready to check? Remember, if you cheat, the Devil eats a kitten. Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia said so.


Here's the answers!


No, are you really ready?

Did you just hear a noise?

Maybe you should check the back door.

I'll wait.




You're back! OK! Check on!

1. Matt has lost his hair.
2. Dave has lost his chin.
3. Rachel is missing an eyebrow.
4. Rachel is also missing a stripe on her tummy.
5. Dave is missing an arm, which is as we know, no impediment to continuing on as a drummer.

Did you get them all? Good! You are brilliant! But not too brilliant if you actually used a crayon on your screen or expect me to send you ten bucks! PSYCH! But if I were going to send you money, I'd tell you to take it and buy wimps' album Repeat, so there!

wimps, "Stop Having Fun," KEXP, 4/28/12