Popthomology

AND NOW, AN EDUCATIONAL VIDEO FOR OUR COVER OF THE DANDY WARHOLS' "WE USED TO BE FRIENDS"

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

MissNine insists that her musical debut has a "real video," (she played cardboard box and sleigh bells on this, and I recorded the rest after she left the room so she wouldn't giggle at me) so of course I am glad to supply her with something to confuse her friends with. If she wanted special effects or talking cats or high-kicking male chorus line dancers, however, she will be gravely disappointed.

I wish I still had my giant red tricycle.

Marianne & M9, "We Used To Be Friends" (Dandy Warhols acoustic cover)

FY INFOTAINMENT...VIDEO: PARENT TO CHILD - ABOUT SEX (1966)

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Well. Well well well. This was...quite a find on the YouTubes today, and I thought it deserved spotlighting. This 30 minute film from 1966 is a frank, humane, and progressive take on how to talk to children about sex and sexuality, and would have been unthinkable for anyone to make just a few years prior in the glossy and repressive 1950s. It is simultaneously dated and still relevant, genuinely informative and generally hilarious. It's so odd, isn't it, that the topic still remains something parents dread and a cause of much avoidance and tittering. Uh huh huh huh huh huh.

Please to enjoy!

Parent To Child - About Sex (1966)

MISS NINE & I COVER THE DANDY WARHOLS' "WE USED TO BE FRIENDS"

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

At last my lovely daughter and I got to do something tonight that we have wanted to do for at least a year -- work together on a song! She was up for doing a Dandy Warhols' cover, and decided she wanted to play drums. "Drums" in the case turned out to be an old Amazon cardboard shipping box and some small sleigh bells. I was up for that, of course.

This is a cover of the Dandies' "We Used To Be Friends," from 2003's "Welcome to the Monkey House," but an acoustic arrangement of the song that I heard them perform on Oregon Public Radio, I believe. It's as low as I can possibly sing without hemorrhaging. Anyway, we had lots of fun doing it and we hope you like it! Thank you, and thank you, Dandy Warhols! And Amazon!

(click here to go to Soundcloud to hear the track if the widget doesn't load for you here, and you can download it there if you wish)

We Used To Be Friends (Dandy Warhols acoustic cover) by MarianneSp

MY THREE FAVORITE THINGS FROM XMAS THIS YEAR

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Present Given, to Couch Young Adult:

Notorious B.I.G. earbuds, $6.99 at Marshall's.

Conversation (12/24/11):

MissNine: Mom, where are you going?

Me: Shopping.

MissNine: For what?

Me: Hanukkah.

MissNine: What??? We aren't Hanukkatarians!

Face, Mr13 (12/25/11):

I hope your Sunday on the 25th of December was pleasant and peaceful, wherever you may be.

VIDEO: DRUNK SANTAS & THE SONICS' "THE VILLAGE IDIOT"

Saturday, December 24, 2011

My gift to you this Christmaakahzaa Eve is a video combining my two most favorite Drunk Santa videos with The Sonics' nutty 1966 version of "Jingle Bells," renamed "The Village Idiot." It can be found on the long-out-of-print Etiquette "Merry Christmas" LP, which also featured holiday tunes from the Wailers and the Galaxies. I think it's a must-have, personally.

Don't drink and drive, Santa!

The Sonics, "The Village Idiot" (Drunk Santa Video Remix)

MY FAVORITE CONCERT PHOTOS THAT I TOOK IN 2011, BY ME, MARIANNE

Friday, December 23, 2011

I always feel -- no, I know -- that I am always passing on opportunities to photograph concerts here in Seattle. There is so much musical stuff going on here all the time that if I went and shot all the shows I wanted to shoot, I would not have time to do the other stuff I must do, like sleep and breathe and drink coffee. So as I was beginning to prep this post today, I was truly surprised to see on my Flickr that in 2011, I photographed 74 different musical acts, and a few of them more than once! Of course, that's not 74 different shows -- there were festivals and opening acts that gave me multiple photo ops in one place -- but still, I am so pleased to have seen so many marvelous bands this year and have been able to capture them as best I can to share with you.

The photos I am selecting as my favorites this year aren't necessarily going to be the most technically perfect, most popular, most published, most iconic, or any of the usual standards one would use to judge a photo. The only criterion I have is that each one has "it" for me: whatever that is that adds up to make me smile, and say, "Yes." I hope they make you smile, too.

January, 2011

Sugar Blue's hands, holding harmonica, Jazz Alley, Seattle, 1/10/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

April, 2011

The Joy Formidable, The Crocodile, Seattle, 4/9/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

Kurt Vile (and yours truly), Sonic Boom Records (Ballard), Seattle, 4/24/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

May, 2011

Guitar Wolf, El Corazon, Seattle, 5/24/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

June, 2011

Cerebral Ballzy, Neumos, Seattle, 6/16/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

Black Lips, Neumos, Seattle, 6/16/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

TacocaT, The Crocodile, Seattle, 6/18/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

Intelligence, The Crocodile, Seattle, 6/18/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

August, 2011

Brush Prairie, Great Idea Music Festival, Enchanted Forest Theme Park, Turner OR, 8/5/11. Shot for Popthomology.

The Wiggles, Paramount, Seattle, 8/10/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

September, 2011

Mavis Staples, Bumbershoot Festival, Seattle, 9/3/11. Shot for Popthomology.

Thee Oh Sees, Bumbershoot Festival, 9/4/11. Shot for Popthomology.

Charles Bradley, Bumbershoot Festival, 9/5/11. Shot for Popthomology.

LeButcherettes, Puyallup (WA) Fair, 9/21/11. Shot for Popthomology.

The Flaming Lips, Puyallup (WA) Fair, 9/21/11. Shot for Popthomology.

School of Rock, Chop Suey, Seattle, 9/24/11. Shot for Popthomology.

October, 2011

The Damned, Showbox Market, Seattle, 10/27/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

November, 2011

Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears, Neptune, Seattle, 11/18/11. Shot for Popthomology.

December, 2011

Grouplove, Deck the Hall Ball, Key Arena, Seattle, 12/7/11. Shot for The Audio Perv.

Young The Giant, Deck the Hall Ball, Key Arena, Seattle, 12/7/11. Shot for The Audio Perv.

Cage The Elephant, Deck the Hall Ball, Key Arena, Seattle, 12/7/11. Shot for The Audio Perv.

Death Cab For Cutie, Deck the Hall Ball, Key Arena, Seattle, 12/7/11. Shot for The Audio Perv.

Tony Bennett, Paramount, Seattle, 12/17/11. Shot for Back Beat Seattle.

VIDEO: VERY VERY LOUD XMAS CAROLERS SINGING ON A BOAT

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

My small neighborhood here on the Eastside of Lake Washington is most often extremely quiet. It's tucked away from any major roads, down a gently sloping hill, and is positively riddled with nature and pricey houses. You would hardly even know that anyone lived here outside of a few cars that drive by and joggers facing the slog going up or the relief coming down the hill. In the springtime, the most annoying sounds come from the birds. Do you have ANY idea how LOUD bald eaglets can be? Jeez. In the summer, I roll my eyes at the daily buzz of Very Loud Fancy Speedboats and Hopefully Expertly-Landed Seaplanes. In the fall, I detest the constant blast of leaf blowers. Oh, the First-World Problems of Suburbia.

And in the winter, by FAR the loudest noises I ever hear come from the annual nightly-for-like-six-weeks lake tours of the Argosy Christmas Ship. It's a beloved holiday tradition here in Seattle and Seattle-ish. Argosy gussies up the very large "Spirit of Seattle" boat with lots of lights, and people buy tickets to chill out on the boat and eat and drink and sing along and drink some more while listening to the 900-part-harmonies of the Dickens Carolers as the boat makes its way to several different docking spots around the lake. At each stop, the public is welcomed to stand and listen to the VERY VERY LOUD MUSIC for about 20 minutes or so. Sometimes there is a bonfire, or gratis hot cocoa.

In years past before I figured out what this WAS, it used to drive me MENTAL. At times, depending on where the boat is docked, I can hear the music PERFECTLY from inside my house, all doors and windows shut for winter, of course, and I'm not super-close to the lake because I am not rich. It sounds like some insane party that you can't even imagine hosting or attending, but you can never quite pinpoint where it IS. So, now I know, and when I hear the ending disco funk of the "Hallelujah Chorus," I know the Christmas Ship will be moving on.

Last night, I took MissNine and we went down to actually SEE the Christmas Ship. Other smaller boats (and all boats on Lake Washington are smaller than this beast) are invited to decorate with lights and tag along behind the Big Boy for the night. No longer do you have to imagine what this might be like, because I took some video. MissNine thought it was way cool and I enjoyed the free Starbucks Mocha and gingerbread samples.

You can from now on further enjoy the thought of me sitting here in my home trying to write stuff in November and December while trying to not be distracted by the lilting insanity of "Holly Jolly Christmas." LA LA LA LA LA.

Argosy Christmas Ship, Carillon Point, Kirkland WA, 12/20/11

MY REVIEW & PHOTOS OF TONY BENNETT AT THE PARAMOUNT...NOW ON BACK BEAT SEATTLE!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

What a genuine honor it was to be able to not only attend last weekend's concert by the incomparable Tony Bennett, but to be able to photograph him as well! I'm still just awestruck. It was a definite highlight of my entire concertgoing year, that's for sure. You may click RIGHT HERE and it will magically take you to my review and photos on Back Beat Seattle! Thanks!

If you have a chance to see Tony perform, do what ya gotta do to get there. That's what I'm tellin' you.

Tony Bennett & Stevie Wonder, "For Once In My Life"

THE POST OFFICE, ON THE MONDAY BEFORE CHRISTMAS

Monday, December 19, 2011

Ungainly, awkward, overloaded
I see the piteous glances directed my way
Those who have finished their tour of duty, leaving
Sadly looking at me, on my way in
As I am carrying two cardboard boxes so huge
I cannot really see where I am going.

Yet
I know where I am
The Post Office, on the Monday before Christmas.

Every year, it is exactly the same
Yet
I cannot seem to shop and wrap any earlier
To avoid
The Post Office, on the Monday before Christmas
So
I suck it up
And try not to fall down
Much.

Aghast I am
When upon reaching the doors to the facility
I see
That there is not only one line threading through the lobby
And out the door
But
TWO LINES!

TWO LINES!

Lamentations!

After some heavy sighs and the rolling of eyes
I inquire at those overburdened prats like me, in front of me
Which line I should participate in
And am directed to
The Line Where You Are Sending More Than One Thing.

I set my boxes on the floor and kick them when the line moves forward
But it takes a very long time to move forward
And I try not to kick the boxes so hard that they
Disengage from the Post Office, on the Monday before Christmas
Through a large plate glass window.

How lucky I am!
A mother with three children under three years old
Gets in line behind me
The oldest asks his mother how long it will take
About 20 times.
The baby blows snot bubbles.
The toddler runs away
The mother runs after the toddler, holding the Snot Baby
And Little Questioner looks at me, and I shrug.

A woman about mid-way up in the line bolts
Holding a brown-paper-wrapped rectangle
That is surely a Most Interesting Book She Thought You Would Like
And she mutters, "It's not worth it,"
Well, duh, Ma'am, duh.

Eventually, I am served
Me and my large packages.
"Do you want to guarantee Christmas Delivery and select Express Mail?"
I look at my large packages
And purse my lips
Successfully restricting my mouth from saying, "HELL, NO"
And politely ask if the packages may be sent Priority Mail
At the Post Office, on the Monday before Christmas.

$27.87.
EACH!
Be gone, packages, be gone!
They are both loaded on the top of an already-overloaded postal cart
Good luck with that, I think
And try not to think about anything that may be glass inside.

VOOM!
My speed leaving the Post Office, on the Monday before Christmas
Is considerably faster
Having been relieved of my burden
And $55.74
And when I see a couple
Warily approaching the doors, I say
"Go To The Line For Shipping Only One Item"
They nod, grimly
And I clap my hands as I reach my car, and leave.

VIDEO: BEST OF FAILS 2011

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Busy day here at Rancho Helliday, but I have something very enjoyable to bring you anyway. That is if, like me, you enjoy watching scads of people wipe out in spectacular fashion, courtesy this compilation video from TwisterNederland. All I can think of when watching this is that our educational system has not done a good enough job in instructing citizens in the basic laws of physics.

Some language NSFW, which is totally and utterly reasonable. The one were the dog starts howling in the distance after a fail cracks me up the most. Please to enjoy!!

Best of Fails 2011 video

XMAS PRESENT WRAPPING HAIKU TIME

Saturday, December 17, 2011

who took the scotch tape?
when I find out who did it
i shall berate you.

oh, christmas gift bag
you are looking quite shabby
reused many times.

what present is this?
i have wrapped you and now i
don't know what you are.

my daughter says, please!
i want to wrap, too! and she
quits in five minutes.

i apologize
for all the damn dog hair stuck
on the damn scotch tape.

cheap cardboard shirt box!
you are so thin and weak that
your corners rip now.

underestimate
when cutting wrapping paper
the ends don't meet, damn.

self-adhesive bow!
untruthful decoration!
you fall off, always.

there's something very
satisfying in curling
ribbon with scissors.

my efforts degrade
and wrapping now looks like a
frankenstein patch job.

the temptation is
strong to wrap nothing more and
just go, here! take it!

oh! when will it end?
the answer is known, well-known:
late on christmas eve.

MY XMAS NEAR-MELTDOWN IN THE DISCOUNT STORE

Friday, December 16, 2011

This is the fourth December I have written this statement here on the ol' blog:

I HATE DECEMBER SO MUCH.

Call me a miserable Scrooge; I DON'T CARE. December has utterly devolved for me over the years into just days and days of DO DO DO and GO GO GO, and not in the good DO GO way that I so love. It's just endless tasks and frustrations, long lines and long lists, crappy weather and crappy traffic, and sullen-eyed Salvation Army bell ringers who stare blankly through you into parking lots jammed with filthy winter-muddy cars and who grunt like grim Santa-hatted ogres when you put a buck in the red bucket. It's 900 emails a DAY screaming, "SAVE NOW! HOLIDAY! 40% OFF! FREE SHIPPING WHEN YOU ENTER CODE #CONSUMERWHORE-LIDAYS NOW!" It's getting invitations to cool parties and shows I CAN'T GO TO because I have to devote every December day and night to MAKING IT ALL HAPPEN!

BAH! HUMBUG!

I should have figured that today was not going to be a particularly tolerable December day right away. If you know me, you know that I am more or less not available in the mornings because I try my very best to remain unconscious at that time. I often don't go to bed until 3 or 4AM and I am a fan of sleeping. So, when I got a call this morning at 8:15AM telling me that MissNine had forgotten the book-exchange gift she was to bring to her classroom party today, the one that we had both purchased and wrapped and was sitting about 4 feet from the door as she went out this morning, I was not very happy to hear that another trip would have to be made today.

SIGH.

I sort of went back to sleep but it wasn't high-quality snooze and I got up around 10AM, bleary and with eyes so bloated they looked like tiny pufferfish hanging out on my face. A cup of coffee and a shower didn't improve the situation.

Off to pick up Mr13 from school midday. He pattted me on the back as he scrambled into the back seat and said all chipper-like, "Hi, Mom! Wow! You look tired!"

GREAT!

Off we go to Target, busy as hell, to get him some winter boots so he can go snow tubing on Monday. "Can't you just buy them? I don't want to go in," he whines.

"NO. YOU ARE COMING IN."

His cheeriness faded rapidly. He hates shopping. It's like dragging along a reluctant puppy with big mopey eyes who keeps glancing to the doors wondering when he can escape. We find the boots, then continue on with a few more items for Christmas until the cart is somehow filled with $300+ worth of crap.

Checkout lane #13 is open.

Dummy. Don't pick 13! OF COURSE, after I loaded all the crap onto the belt, the price scanner STOPPED WORKING COMPLETELY. This sent several Target employees into a tizzy, entering supervisor codes, clicking uselessly on the scanner gun, and the checkout lady yelling at everyone who tried to put their stuff on the belt behind mine,

"YOU CAN'T CHECK OUT HERE! MY SCANNER IS DOWN! THANK YOU!"

Mr13 looked at me like he was being sent to Guantanamo. One by one, the item codes were entered by hand, but the checkout lady's eyesight was not so great, or perhaps her fingers were too fat. Time after time, she entered the wrong numbers.

I had no food to eat yet, just the coffee, and considered grabbing the screaming toddler in the next aisle over to take a good meaty chomp.

Many years later, the checkout process was finally finished, we drove the gift book over to MissNine's school, went home and dropped off the Target stuff and Mr13, noted that my $2430 CHRISTMAS PRESENT OF HARD DRIVE CRASH RECOVERY was left in a box at the doorstep, left again to pick up MissNine, came back, made dinner, then took Mr13 to martial arts class. On the way back home from dropping him off, I stopped by discount store Tuesday Morning, thinking perhaps I could get a few more little items for Christmas for my mom before I shipped a box off to her. I poked around, not seeing too much, when I noticed that I was feeling increasingly IRRITATED. Over the store PA system, this song was playing:

Alanis Morissette, "All I Really Want"

Now, I've had my share of moments listening to bad piped-in store music; we all have. But as this song kept playing, I kept getting more and more MAD, although I don't think you could have seen it. Well, OK, if you were around when I muttered "Jesus F-ing Christ! This is horrible!" you might think I was having some issues. It kept going. This, I thought, is possibly the worst professional million-selling female vocalist in the known world. Her wildly off-key pitch and harsh nasality combined with that INTOLERABLE GASPING AND HICCUPING YELP SHE DOES was enough to get me to do something I have NEVER ONCE EVER done in my whole life.

I took my shopping basket and made my way to the counter. I looked the clerk in the eye. She was about my age and looked similarly tired. I spoke, making the same sad puppy face Mr13 had made in Target.

"This song...is terrible. Would you mind changing it?"

She looked a little shocked. I made my face look more pathetic. Then she leaned over the counter closer to me and replied quietly, in a husky voice whose patina was surely honed by 30 or so years of whiskey and Marlboros,

"It IS terrible, hon. You got it!"

She walked to her left through a door that led to a side room, and instantly, Alanis was replaced by Patsy Cline. Ahhhhh. "Thank you so much," I grinned.

I continued my shopping, got a few more things now that I could be Alanis-free, checked out and drove home, where MissNine promptly asked,

"DID YOU GET A GIFT FOR MEEEEE?"

CHOMP.

HIPPOS: WHO KNEW THEY COULD DO THIS???

Thursday, December 15, 2011

I played this video over and over and laughed and laughed. Yes, I am five years old. WOW! This guy could solve the energy crisis!

AWESOME HIPPO

VIDEO: STEVIE RIKS TAKES ON RAY & DAVE DAVIES

Thursday, December 15, 2011

After seeing this tip from Kinks fan Kevin Wayne on the venerable Kinks Digest mailing list this morning, I felt compelled to share this video of musical comic Stevie Riks' dead-on take of the Davies Brothers. The only things I might take note as slight imperfections are that Dave Davies' voice is actually even higher, and that Ray would never be so patient.