Recently, on a lovely vacation seeing lovely friends, I revisited some of the wondrous Miami-area thrift stores that I've enjoyed discovering over the last few years. Yes, of course there are the same Barbra Streisand/Mitch Miller/marching band LPs that are no longer wanted by anyone anywhere, but Sofla has its own unique spin (PUN) on record rejects. Please to enjoy these I have selected for you whilst imagining the smell of 50 years of dust! Click to enlarge!

I admire this woman's appearance as one I have always aspired to in that go-go girl/Marcia Brady way. But the real win here is the BEST BAND NAME EVER, "Los Angeles Negros."

Does this translate to "The Third Person?" I know I could look it up but I'm too lazy. Anyway, I'm kinda thinking the girl is the same girl with two different wigs on so this makes this concept especially bizarre and intriguing. 

Is it just me, or does this guy have a beard that looks like the Batsignal? He is in Gotham City, after all!

I'm having trouble connecting this scenario to accordion music. Or, to anything I've known or heard of.

This bikini babe seems way more interested in the palm tree than in Mario. 

I'm trying to work out the visual concept here. "Yeah, ok, let's go to a field with some mountains. Then, let's add a bikini babe in a sheer shirt. And then let's make her stand on what is either a super-modern Lucite chair or a plastic portal to the underworld. Fabuloso!"

You wanna know what my pregnancy exercise program was? OLYMPIC-LEVEL BARFING!

Would I send my kids over to some place called "Birthday House" with a middle-aged-man learning on a Dutch door? Nope, I would not. The twin boys here agree.

I feel like I've put this cover up before. It's entirely possible it's the very same record still in the very same thrift store that I last visited 5 years ago. Let's hear it for the Shipmates of Song!

All I can think about with this one is that women's skirt hemlines used to be strictly dictated each fashion season by some sour people who actually believed this was important.

What, specifically, would make aerobics Jewish? 

Our friend Sabra probably would know the answer to the above question, and she would also be able to give you a lengthy tutorial on liquid eyeliner application.

OK, perhaps this could be modified now to "Student Days at USC (Student Fake Rowing Team Songs)"

And finally, I want you to mull over the fashion and hair styles of the Paranas while appreciating their pro-level Sears catalog modeling poses.