(Today, our Popthomology office, located in Seattle-ish, received the following letter to the editor via hand-delivered Express Mail, which we are publishing verbatim and responding to immediately. -- Ed.)
Jan 2018
To the Editor
Popthomology Musical Cyber Website;
Many congratulations to veteran rock photographer Marianne Spellman and the editorial staff of your esteemed publication! "My Favorite Concert Photos of 2017 By Me" is a testament to the magnificent artistic skill that is possible with a camera and an amazing eye. The framing, the colors, the action, and the subtle balance of light and all that other artsy stuff, it really spoke not only to me, but no doubt to your many subscribers and A&R heads that hang on your every word and get lost in each perfect pixel...
I do wish to set the record straight, however, regarding an editorial oversight that could jeopardize out cordial working relationship. If you haven't received concerned letters from other fans, or aren't yet aware of what I'm about to refer to, I'd be surprised, but my conscience needs to be clear.
As a proportion of you 17-photo curation, I could not help but notice that STALLION received only 2 selections. Incidentally, one of those photos is, without a doubt, one of your favoritest ever. STALLION should have been at least half of those "selections."
We've suffered through injustices before, but this one feels like a low blow to the beans when an impartial referee has their back turned. If y'all feel like you wasn't provided with enough choice snaps of us knockin' the bottom out of every other crummy rock band in the U.S., then you got to stop missing all our shows. It simply defies belief that a coffee-house amateur like Lars Finberg would grace your pages, or that Ty Segall would be sucking up all the computer juice.
You did make the right call in one instance. I did agree with the editorial decision to imply that JACUZZI BOYS are doing quite well in the toilet rock scene, because their tunes are as every bit fresh as a new urinal cake.
I've said my piece, but I fully take the blame. So I make to you this promise: I, Luscious Luke, will not rest til STALLION makes 9+ of 17 selections in the 2018 roundup, and I will give y'all a goddamn show the likes of which you have never seen.
Best wishes in the New Year,
LL
Luscious Luke, STALLION
January 31, 2018
TO: Mr. Luscious Luke
FROM: The Editorial Board of Popthomology
RE: "My Favorite Concert Photos of 2017 By Me," Marianne Spellman
Dear Mr. Luke:
Thank you for your thoughtful and erudite letter. We appreciate your patronage at Popthomology and admire the vigor in which you express your convictions on this matter. With the fundamental belief of freedom of the press in mind, we stand by Ms. Spellman's selection of photographs in the above-mentioned post, despite your ardent stance that STALLION was grossly underrepresented.
Ms. Spellman thanks you for your effusive compliments about her work, and also wishes to point out that, in fact, two more photos in that post were Stallion-related: the photo of wrestlers from your very own Backyard Bunkhouse BBQ Brawl & Rock 'n Wrestling Rager, and Spellman herself dressed as "Luscious Luke" for Halloween. It is rumored that you yourself are standing next to her in that photo, but we at Popthomology do not indulge in heresay nor gossip.
Furthermore, we support your right to your personal musical opinions, but believe that Mr. Finberg, Mr. Segall, and Messrs. Boys are fully worthy of inclusion on this site. Perhaps these industry "beefs" are best settled in the ring or on the performance stage; our office cannot function as a well-respected beacon of the media if constantly dealing with disgruntled fans demanding 100% of our content be STALLION-based. They have eaten all our donuts from the break room, have thrown all our chairs around, and keep trying to pin our interns to the floor.
On behalf of the editors and Ms. Spellman, we look forward to providing a fair and balanced coverage of STALLION in 2018, and eagerly await further events from your combo.
Cordially,
The Editorial Staff of Popthomology
© Copyright 2008- Marianne Spellman