Yesterday, I invested some time into watching a documentary about salt mining. There are people who devote their entire lives to harvesting salt from the earth, sometimes at great personal risk, so that you may enjoy a flavorful Dorito. Me, I spent my time harvesting weird images from the bowels of the thrift store, so that you may enjoy an element of surprise and/or joy in your day. I await patiently for my own documentary. Until then, please to enjoy these latest finds!!

Keeper? GUESS NOT.

My question: how can you bring it back if it was never there to begin with?

I regret not buying this, just to hear "Feelings" on the Happy Accordion. Once.

These unbearably ugly figurines look like they've been dug up from the grave.

Bob and Lynda look to me like they are running some kind of "live" business down by Sailor Town, if you get my drift.

There's a lot to wonder about here, but for me I'm stuck on why the taller man is wearing white go-go boots.

I hope one of the secretos is the answer to why he calls himself José José, rather than just José, or José José José José José José José José José José José José José .

If the band name "Seduce" isn't vile enough, we can imagine that this woman with the protruding nipple is waiting to shoot one of the members of Seduce for giving her head lice.

What sort of songs would be on "Bighorn?" "Saturday Night Rut?" "My Cliff Or Yours?" "Sheepless Nights?"

"Keep on truckin'" was a hippie phrase of the '70's which was co-opted for use by actual truckers like Larry here, who made an album that no one bought.

Quit threatening me with blessings, Kent and Cathy!!!!

From the grown-out perm to the Hair Club For Men stare to the name, all good.

Someone needs to inform Tante Paule that her forehead does not suffer from myopia.

Every Heino record cover is a gem, but this one is extra extra awesome. Sing mit Heino!

I'm sorry, I don't see Jesus on this record cover with BirGitta, so I'm doubting already. Not that she left any ROOM from him, jeez.

I'm hoping Heintje is the bastard son of Heino, who is insanely driven to top his absent father on the record charts, and to someday take away his German Shepherds in cruel triumph.


Straight. Up. NUTS.

The young Asian girl and the gray kitty are pretending not to know that the evil White Pig Kitty is getting ready to smack the crap out of White Dumbass Kitty.

Bunny does NOT WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING EVER, including the cat drama above.

As the cat couple sit transfixed to another episode of TLC's "My Big Fat Boils Life," the fancy couple behind them prepare to startle them with a dove.

I believe this was in Donald Trump's record collection, and he deported it to Value Village.

Finally, we smile at the youth who lost his record cover and made his own.